I'll Keep you Close by Jeska Verstegen translated by Bill Nagelkerke

"I'm sick of the silence. ... Even when you don't speak, you're still saying something."

I picked up this book in a Melbourne bookshop. Why? I liked the cover (first impressions do count). The cover of the English version of this book is by David Weisner (you may know his fabulous books such as his wordless book Tuesday). Then I read that it was originally published in Dutch (translating books costs a lot of money so usually these books are well worth reading). Finally, I read the blurb and I was intrigued. 

Listen to an audio sample (5 minutes) from the beginning of the book. Here is a video video introduction from the publisher. Here is the review from Lamont Books (this book was included with their Lower Secondary standing order).  I have listed this book as Young Adult. Some booksellers suggest age nine but I think this book is more suited to mature readers aged 11+. 

Publisher blurb: Jeska doesn’t know why her mother keeps the curtains drawn so tightly every day. And what exactly is she trying to drown out when she floods the house with Mozart? What are they hiding from?  When Jeska’s grandmother accidentally calls her by a stranger’s name, she seizes her first clue to uncovering her family’s past, and hopefully to all that’s gone unsaid. With the help of an old family photo album, her father’s encyclopedia collection, and the unquestioning friendship of a stray cat, the silence begins to melt into frightening clarity: Jeska’s family survived a terror that they’ve worked hard to keep secret all her life. And somehow, it has both nothing and everything to do with her, all at once. A true story of navigating generational trauma as a child, I’ll Keep You Close is about what comes after disaster: how survivors move forward, what they bring with them when they do, and the promise of beginning again while always keeping the past close.

Jeska's class are studying World War II and in particular the impact of these events on The Netherlands. At home no one will answer her questions, so she starts a list with the words - who, what, where, how, why and when and every time she hears or learns even the tiniest fragment of information, she adds it to her notebook. Her teacher has talked about the terrible treatment of the Jewish people. He is planning to read a book to the class - Winter in Wartime - but when her mother discovers this, she tells the school Jeska cannot attend this class and instead must sit in a different part of the school each afternoon. Jeska has no idea why. Also no one will talk about Hesje - the name her grandmother used when she was confused during one of their visits to the nursing home. Bomma has a photo album but who are these people and what happened to them?

Going back to what I said about this book being a translation, I did marvel at the poetic language and phrases - here are a few examples:

"A school is a king of monster with a belly full of children. In the morning it gobbles children up, and in the afternoon, it spits them all out again. Me included."

"I step onto the red gravel of our driveway. When you walk on it, it sounds like you're crunching on a biscuit."

"Mr Schouderland is going bald. His hairline is shaped like a small harbour where two boats could anchor."

"I watch my mirror image brush away the tears. I trace the outline of my face in the mirror. My light-coloured eyes stare back at me, a little sad perhaps, but still sparkling. A small face, pale skin, dark hair. Ordinary. A forehead, a jaw, a nose. Nothing special. Except it's my face. Hidden behind it are my thoughts and stories, including today's. Is it a Jewish face that looks back at me? It doesn't feel Jewish. But how does that actually feel? I have no idea."

Here is an interview with Jeska about her book.

Jeska Verstegen is an author and illustrator living in Amsterdam. She is a descendant of Emanuel Querido, the revolutionary Jewish-Dutch publisher who was captured and killed by the Nazis in World War II. Jeska began her career in 1990 as an illustrator for magazines and children's books. I’ll Keep You Close is her debut novel, based on the true story of her own family history.

Debut author Vestergen tells this true story of her family’s previously unrevealed identity and history. ... Setting this book apart from other Holocaust survivor stories are the language and imagery, a family story that focuses on very young children, the Dutch setting, and the attempts of a sensitive young person to understand mystifying adult behavior and PTSD—in its specificity, it finds the universal. Kirkus Star review

Here is the Dutch cover of I'll Keep you Close.

Read about the translator Bill Nagelkerke here. He translated has some books I have read and enjoyed: Eep! by Joke van Leeuwen; The Day My Father Became a Bush by Joke Van Leeuwan; and Wolf and Dog by Sylvia Vanden Heede.