Friday, May 20, 2022

Bedtime Story by Chloe Hooper


"If I squint, I can almost see it, this perfect children's picture book of death ... "
"Can practising pain on the page circumvent it in real life?"

"Sometimes we sneak a look at the last page of a book to see if it's safe to read on. 
We want to find out if the protagonist survives"

In the city today I walked past a very eye-catching display window of a large city bookstore. The featured book was Bedtime Story and while I had not heard of the author (because I mostly read children's books) the illustrator and title caught my eye. 

Inside the store I picked up the book (which was strategically placed right beside the door) and I read the glowing endorsements - one by a children's author:

'Deeply engrossing and honest, human, full of love and tenderness, with moments of sparkling humour in the struggle. I loved everything about Bedtime Story. I loved particularly what it taught me about authors who write for children, the ways that writing and reading provides compensation, balancing the scales between loss and love.’ Sophie Laguna

So yes I purchased Bedtime Story (oddly I had decided not to buy any books today in the city!).

You do need to know this is an adult book. YES I actually read an adult book (my second one this year) and I read the whole book in just over two hours in one sitting. 

Here is the publisher blurb (Simon and Schuster): When Chloe Hooper’s partner is diagnosed with a rare and aggressive illness, she has to find a way to tell their two young sons. By instinct, she turns to the bookshelf. Can the news be broken as a bedtime tale? Is there a perfect book to prepare children for loss? Hooper embarks on a quest to find what practical lessons children’s literature—with its innocent orphans and evil adults, magic, monsters and anthropomorphic animals—can teach about grief and resilience in real life. From the Brothers Grimm to Frances Hodgson Burnett and Tolkien and Dahl—all of whom suffered childhood bereavements—she follows the breadcrumbs of the world’s favourite authors, searching for the deep wisdom in their books and lives. Both memoir and manual, Bedtime Story is stunningly illustrated by the New York Times award-winning Anna Walker. In an age of worldwide uncertainty, here is a profound and moving exploration of the dark and light of storytelling.

Read more about this book:

The Conversation May 5th, 2022

Sydney Morning Herald 28th April, 2022

Readings (Melbourne)

This book is illustrated by Anna Walker. Here is a video where you can see Anna creating illustrations for this book.



So what do I think? Clearly Chloe Hooper has done a huge amount of research both in her search for picture books to read to her two young sons and later about the lives and young grief of many classic children's authors. These include CS Lewis; Eric Carle; JM Barrie; Kenneth Grahame; JK Rowling; and JRR Tolkein. I certainly discovered some interesting things about the childhood experiences of these authors and the way their personal grief influenced their writing. There are also lots of fairy tale references in this book (some I will need to investigate further). I enjoyed the 'academic' aspects of this book and also the very personal journey she describes as the family navigate their cancer journey. 

What I wanted from this book? The first half of this book is about the search for a picture book to read to her sons. I wanted to know which books she found and which books she thought might be useful and of course which books she really did not like. 

"I began to imagine a book that I will find to read to you. It will be written simply, clearly; gently levering open a crushing conversation, with each illustration capturing some essential poetry. Perhaps these images are black and white, before colour rushes in towards the end, with golden, hope-flecked fireworks blooming on the last page. A finale signalling that this will one day be bearable, there will be grace. And meanwhile, the text won't have said too much or too little providing us, wonderfully, with a map of how to survive."

Chloe Hooper dismisses books which feature the death of a pet or an elderly grandparent but I do think reading some of these may have been very worthwhile. Chloe says she did not want books as described here:

"Sure, a child's pet cat dies. Or an anthropomorphised pig grandmother is carefully phased out."

I disagree. Take a look at my post about The Last Goodbye and in particular watch this video by a grief therapist. 

By the way I guess her pig reference might be this book (which I adore).


I said in my post: Old Pig is a very beautiful story about our life journey and the way that journey might end. Old Pig is preparing to die. Ron Brooks has created very gentle illustrations. This is a book to read slowly and it is also a book that, if read at the right time, may help a child make sense of the journey we all travel in our lives.

Chloe Hooper does mention a few children's picture books: Leaf Litter by Rachel Tonkin; Duck, Death and the Tulip by Wolf Erlbruch (Kirkus review); Michael Rosen's Sad book; and The Memory Tree by Britta Teckentrup (here is a review by Little Parachutes). 

"But the truth is, half of this collection is still in my study and I haven't actually read them to you or your brother. Often a book will seem too hot or too cold, too hard or too soft. That or there's a threshold I can't cross."

My wise friend from Kinderbookswitheverything has an extensive Pinterest collection of books on the topic of death and grief.  We both firmly believe it is not appropriate to share these books over the days close to the death of a family member but rather to read some just naturally as a part of your regular book sharing routine. Here are a few books I would like to share with Chloe as an adult reader but not necessarily books to share with her two precious children because some of these are not the right books for these circumstances:









Two questions: On page 55 Chloe Hooper mentions a Grade One read her son bought home about Hercules - I would love to have seen the bibliographic details listed at the back of the book.

At the start of chapter 7 Chloe Hooper says her son's Kindy teacher read the class an alphabet book which listed I is for Iliad.  I recently completed a talk for IBBY Australia about Alphabet books so I am very curious about the title of this one. 

"A group of six-year-olds ... heard about the Trojans surging up the beach to set the Greek ships alight. Bloody battles every day, gore strewn on the sand."  

I am amazed the Kindy teacher shared this book with her class.

One final review quote about Bedtime Story:

"Chloe Hooper has a formidable talent to take complex stories and ideas and truths, and to distil them into a language of direct and powerful beauty. This is a story of grief and of patience, of hope and acceptance. It is also a reminder of the solace that books give us, and of how the imaginary worlds we dive into as children remain with is for all our lives, of how they guide us into adulthood and maturity. There is a quiet courage and strength in this book. It is both gentle and uncompromising, a love letter to family and to literature that is bracingly unsentimental. I was profoundly moved, and profoundly grateful.’" Christos Tsiolkas

Post script to this post - tonight I found an article in The Guardian where Chloe Hooper talks further about the books she purchased for her children and some well informed bookseller recommendations. AND Chloe has discovered my purpose for this post - to read these books as a part of a mix of picture books we share with children and not as a panacea following the sadness of an actual event. 

Near our house there’s a children’s bookshop. The bookseller gently directed me to the best books to navigate rugged terrain. It turns out children are natural philosophers who are intrigued by life’s biggest mystery: death. Who knew the right book on this subject can be informative and comforting? I guess the bookseller did. But I’d now encourage adults to add this topic into children’s literary diet early, to not wait until your family is forced to confront this conversation in extremes. Giving children a framework to think about death provides them ballast when the inevitable hard time comes. The Guardian

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